D.I.V.O.R.C.E.

My last post ended with the sentence, “stick a fork in us, we are done.” My husband of 27 years commented that it’s painful to walk around with an embedded fork. That is true.

I can’t fix our fate, much as I’d like to. But I do think, a lot, about how we could make life better here in America, while it all falls apart.

One of the best loved doomer novels is Nevil Shute’s On the Beach. The action takes place in Australia after a catastrophic nuclear event. Because of the hemispheric differences, Australia is the last area to get the extinction level fallout. And because radiation sickness is painful and drawn out, the merciful government hands out suicide pills.

I think that is a lovely gesture. We’re doomed, but we could go quietly, painlessly, and with dignity.

To that end, I propose some actions for your consideration.

I’ve said before that I think Abraham Lincoln was wrong to spill 600,000 lives to keep the confederacy in the union. We should have freed the slaves and let those states go. Our divisions cannot be healed.

I’d like a divorce. I don’t want to be married to the idiots anymore. I know it’s going to be wrenching and painful and costly, but the relief we will feel (and they will too) when it’s over will be lovely.

Let’s break up. The GOP…all of them, from Trump to everyone else….out. You go live in the former slave states.

Florida, Alabama, Texas, both Carolinas, Virginia, Georgia, Tennessee, Mississippi, Louisiana, Arkansas, West Virginia would all go. And I’d throw Missouri and Arizona into that group. The idiots in Idaho, Wyoming, Montana would have to make a choice, assuming they are not registered as Republicans. But all registered Republicans go.

Think of it.

All of the people who believe the earth is 6,000 to 8,000 years old (and flat) and that evolution is not real, who want a theocracy, who deny climate change….all of them….gone. Fox News, Rupert Murdoch, Alex Jones, Rush Limbaugh, the Koch Brothers, the Mercer’s, the KKK, the Nazi’s, they can continue on in another country, not ours. Their guns can go with them, of course.

Oh. Just thinking about what a relief that would be is so so lovely!

Trump can rule from Mar-A-Lago and everybody can be happy.

We can have a free and open election and elect someone competent. The US territories of Puerto Rico and the US Virgin Islands and Guam can vote on whether or not they want to become states in our United States with full representation and voting rights, or go the independent country route.

Of course, we would have to build a wall and have security to keep the cult members where they belong and our country safe.

There would be hardship and turmoil, of course. This happens in any break up of this magnitude. But it would force a rethinking on both sides of how to proceed. One side could have sensible regulations, universal health care, a secular government, good public education, and qualified public officials to make policy and laws that benefit and protect the citizens.

The other side can implement whatever the fuck they want, as long as they don’t bother us.

At the very least, this would keep us occupied. We would need to concentrate on our own problems for a period of time, so we would stop bombing, intervening, interfering, and otherwise screwing up other countries for awhile. Considering we have done all of that for about 93% of our entire existence as a country, I’m sure the world would appreciate the break.

It’s a great mulligan in the sense that we could use this opportunity to fix some problems. Like, overturning Citizen’s United and repealing the laws that say that corporations are people. Having independent commissions do the redistricting. Public financing of elections. Sane gun laws.

People who don’t identify with the groups named above, who are not registered as republicans, can choose which country they want to live in. But they will swear an oath to the abide by the constitution of the United States of America.

I see this as essentially bloodless because both sides win. The people who want white male supremacy and a theocracy can go ahead and have what they want. They just won’t be able to impose their unconstitutional ideas on us.

I think it’s time to quit pretending we can compromise and fix all of this together. Yes, that’s a wonderful ideal, but not practical. Our differences are deeply entrenched and I doubt any amount of counseling can or will work. We’ve been fighting the same fights over and over again with no one really happy with the outcomes. The idiots hate us and we hate them and these are irreconcilable differences.

Clean break, with maybe a 24 month period for people to move to their assigned or preferred countries, and then we start with the wall, which I’m sure people on both side of will pay for, and then we can all get on with our lives until the big collapse.

It could be done.

 

 

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